Know Why You Need to Stop Yelling at Your Kids?

13 July 2022
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How you choose to parent your child is a personal and intimate decision. The experiences that each family goes through when raising a child are unique and full of challenges that are new and overwhelming for a new parent. That being said, there are some universal parenting mishaps that can have a lasting impression on your child in a negative sense. Yelling and shouting at your kids is one of them. One of the essential things to keep in mind as a parent is that we are our children’s first superheroes, idols, and primary impressionists. All of our actions and mannerisms, even the slightest ones, get internalized by our kids from a very young age.

Did you think screaming at your child would help discipline them better? Think again. From psychological effects to making them more reckless, here's why you shouldn't resort to just yelling. Instead, here are a few ways to help discipline your kids.

Sometimes we yell as a reflex. In most heightened cases, during the most heated tantrum from your kid, the natural response from a parent would be to yell and instantly silence their kid. A parent might be tired, overworked, or even disappointed in choosing this action, but yelling takes a second, and the consequences of yelling last a lifetime. Young children often have blown out tantrums at a young age to alert their primary caregiver towards a pressing issue in their immediate environment, or as a means to seek attention. The next time your child throws a tantrum, instead of instantly yelling or seeking to end it, observe what aggravates or pushes your child into this behavior. Any sort of reaction, whether affectionate or negative, inevitably leads them to indulge in tantrums in the future.

In most cases, temper tantrums and meltdowns are a common path for developments for young ones and toddlers. At this age, they are going through a lot of changes, and tantrums are just a way to communicate their needs and wants as their language skills are not developed yet. With teenagers and older kids, we see negative and standoffish behavioral patterns that are more linked to puberty and the massive hormonal changes that a child goes through. Instead of yelling, centering parenting around empathy, opening a dialogue, outcome based tasks, drawing a strict boundary and other habits may help.

Now, not yelling does not mean that we cannot set strict boundaries with our children. Lenient parenting styles, although effective, have numerous pitfalls as well as they do not foster discipline and the concept of consequences in your children. Have a strict discussion with your children about negative behaviors and thresholds, and set strict consequences for the same. Be consistent with your punishments. If your children observe that they can get away with being disobedient and impolite, these behaviors will be reinforced at the end of the day. There are other, more productive ways to discipline and parent your child than yelling. That can set the tone at home for what is appropriate and what is not.

Always remember that early childhood experiences set the tone for adult socialization and behaviors. The way they get treated, the behaviors that they observe become a part of their daily behavior in the future, and as a parent we have the biggest responsibility of shaping future minds!

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